February 19, 2009

Tonight was the monthly Penticton Writer’s Group meeting, and the challenge for this month was to write a sonnet. Since I missed the last meeting, I didn’t know what the challenge was… so emailed the lady in charge – and consequently had very little time to write a poem in a format that I haven’t tried since I was in high school, over 30 years ago! Since I was in a rush, I decided to make life easy for myself, and turn a story I had written previously into a sonnet. Well, it turns out that while I got the format (3 quatrains and a couplet, and English sonnet ryhme scheme abab cdcd efef gg, and iambic pentameter) more or less right, I didn’t quite “get” the need for a “hook” when moving from 2nd to 3rd quatrains, and I totally forgot I was supposed to include metaphor! Finally, when I read my effort to the group, they all agreed that my 8th line should have been my beginning line! Yikes! So I am going to try and rewrite the thing, putting in a hook and using metaphor — and moving line 8 to line 1, which of course means I’m going to have to pretty much rewrite the sonnet, seeing as how that will totally affect the rhyme scheme etc. Oh well! I like my effort anyway! So I’m going to put it here as it currently stands. (If you want to see the “story” it’s based on, you can check it out at http://penandpapermama.com/2008/03/27/i-must-go-down-to-the-seas-again/

Yon island, gray-shadowed, calls in the mist,
Defines far horizon’s long ocean reach.
In sky, heavy silver-lined clouds, drooping, list
O’er rippled waves seeking home on the beach.
The boom of the waves, the call of the sea,
Black raven’s brisk hop, eagle’s lofty sway,
Red splash of wild berry, dune’s sandy lea,
On the gray-green ground of a rain-splattered day.
Chill windy hours on a long lonely shore,
Wild joyous freedom, wonder, beauty, all.
Alone, not lonesome, with nature I soar,
Drawn in, heart open, to Creator’s call.
Far island, lone shoreline, and rich tidal fen,
Mystery, deep longing, you call me again.

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