January 11
Snowed some more late afternoon, early evening yesterday… but is already above freezing, so I expect the snow will continue to slowly melt away. Yesterday, looking out the upstairs window over the surrounding area (before the fresh snow)… everything looked futuristic-post-nuke-apocolyptic…. dull gray skies, dirty grimy banks of half-frozen half-melted snow and slush bordering dusty barren cracked and pot-holed roadways, with filthy- and rusty-looking vehicles and equipment parked haphazardly amid the snowbanks; no movement of traffic or people, just a few dead brown leaves and scraps of paper and plastic skittering along, pushed by stray gusts of wind….
And then a bit of fresh snow came drifting down from the darkening evening sky, and the street lamps came on, together making the world look new and pure and beautiful again for a few moments…
Dear God: In te sermon today, the pastor said: “When you are walking in th power and authority of God, you can expect opposition! People are going to say, “Has God really said that?” (Gen 3:1) You can only be sure, put your life on the line, if you are walking in close relationship with god.
Lord, I don’t find “people” challenging me on that very often – but, boy oh boy, the enemy does all the time (just as he did to Eve!). Sometimes I am left feeling discouraged because it really does seem to me that every time I think I’ve really heard Your voice (to do something), it seems like nothing comes of it! I know it’s probably just Your timing, and all that stuff I’m posting will maybe help someone some time.. It’s funny, all the past month when I wasn’t posting my blogging, I was getting loads of “spam comments” on my site…. but now that I’ve started posting a lot, I’m getting close to none at all! (not to mention the lack of any real comments!)… wierd…. or, maybe, just an opportunity to believe, in faith, like Abraham… Like the reading I just did this afternoon, where Abraham obeyed God when God told him to take Isaac to sacrifice him on Mount Moriah… that should have been really depressing to Abraham, you’d think, but Abraham just plain obeyed… and even after that, though God did provide that ram, Abraham never did personally see the “great nation” God promised, or the promised kings (and especially the ultimate King, Jesus!). Like it says in Hebrews 11:13,16: “All these died in faith, without receiving the promises, but having seen them and welcomed them from a distance…. Therefore god.. prepared a city for them.
Dear God, please help me have that kind of faith, that maintains its hope in You and Your promises, whether or not I “see” the “results.” Thank You!
(I guess this relates, too, to all those people in my prayer list for whom I, and many others, have prayed for so long… and sometimes it seems like You are answering – like when ___ was doing so much better healthwise…. and sometimes You do clearly answer – like protecting my daughters and their babies during pregnancy difficulties…. but so many times it seems like prayers just don’t get answered (or seem to be getting answered, like ___’s health, and then just seem to unravel) … or things happen and it looks like my prayers (which I thought were in line with Your will – or maybe I just hoped???) – just seemed to turn into total hopelessness – like when ____ died in tragic circumstances after all my prayers for her to be a woman of God to her people… and then there are the people I pray for, and I never do know what became of those needs, or even of them…)
FAITH… just letting You do Your thing (purposes) in Your way and Your time!!
